DON'T JUDGE ME!

DON’T JUDGE ME!

I heard you! Yea you!
Don't give me that look
First I saw you point fingers a me
With the look in your eyes
Filled with disgust and disdain
You turned to the girl who was
 Sitting next to you
Moved your lips closer to her ears
That was you reactivating 
Your art mode
Then you started speaking 
Your words painting with range of colours
Well stuffed in your pallette.

You weren't aware I heard you
But I did!
First, you called me a liar, a pretender
A murderer and a lifetime prostitute
You said I am not a girl anyone
Reasonable should associate with
Woah! Such an art
Me vobis picta nigrum
You painted me black!
Maybe I was all you called me
And more
But how dare you judge me
When He redeemed me
Cos last week I knelt down
Next to Dede and she prayed with me
And led me to Christ

But then, you hate my past
Well, I do too
I admit with no stress that
I was a total mess until
I confessed!
Yea it is true; I confessed
So He let down his dew
To away wash my sins 
Then He put me in Him
With my wrongs gone
He gave me a new song

But wait! To you, it cannot be
That simple or can it?
Cos the way you see me
I am as dark as coal
And you think there is little or 
No cleansing for my soul
Hence your criticism will continue
Until others think so
I am yet to understand how you 
Can detest me so much and 
At the same time love God when 
The same God really loves me.

You don’t know my story
At least not completely
Don't get me wrong
Cos the driving force does 
Not justify my action
But I will tell you
The short version of my story
About three years ago
My dad left home
I was left with two
It was hard but I took it
My mama got really sick and 
Not long after she died 
Then I was 16 years
I was left with one
My little brother, Daniel
I call him Danny
We were barely coping with feeding 
When Danny got sick
The doctor said Daniel needed 
A surgery within 7 days
The surgery he really needed 
Was extremely expensive
And they were not going
To commence the operation
Not before payment of at least 
Two-third the price of the surgery

Arghh …
There was no food, no money
And if I did't act fast
It was going to be; no Danny!
He was all. .. all I had
No! I could not take that
Danny got pale
His medications were to no avail
He got worse with each passing day
He needed the surgery!
I met a man in the hospital
His name- Simon
His appearance was that of someone wealthy
So, I told him about Danny
He was willing to help and that 
Made me get really excited
Little did I know that telling him
Was my first step into the room
Of my doom
He was going help but
I would have to meet a certain condition
He paid the bills
Danny had the survey 
And started to get better
But all that was because I played along 
I met Simon's horrible condition
He deflowered me!
He snatched my beauty and my will
And left me sad, blank and broken!

In no time I started sleeping around
Actually, it became "my thing”
I lied to Danny many times
I told him that I had several night shifts
At the hotel I was working at
I needed to stop, but I didn’t
Later on, it got coupled with
Masturbation
Ohh! I was so entrapped by the
Pressure and pleasure
And yea; I even killed
Neither once nor twice
Cos I had several abortions
And I worsened it by covering up
With logical explanations
I kept telling myself that it was
The only means by which I could 
Take care of Danny and I 
But deep down I knew it wasn’t
It got to a point when I was sure
Something was missing
I thought of turning to the Christ 
People kept talking about
But I felt most of the Christians I knew
Were just enduring and not enjoying
I saw Christianity as ‘something’ that
Could rip off my freedom to choose
I was unaware that it is the only means
By which we can choose true freedom
Well, I decided to try it
My plan was to pop into Christianity
Maybe get kinda involved and
If i isn’t so pleasing I could
Walk right out
I didn’t have to be convinced to
Stay cos His grace and mercy
Kept me from exceeding 3 years 
Of great turmoil and turbatio

So I am here today
Ready to change
Even now I know not how I am
To pour out to Danny the uncoated truth
I am at the standing start
Yet to master my path
I am moving at snail’s pace
So failure seems to stare at me 
Right in the face
The rail is real dark so sometimes
I go way off track
But He still has my back
He is on my case
He is with me in the race
He has erased all my sins
Without leaving a trace
He has forgiven me 
and He loves me

So why? Why judge me?
Seriously you are not going to
Judge me forever right?
There is point where you will
Just have to stop and 
Let me re-write my story
My story begins with my past
Which you know is far from good
Bu give me a break cos Christ died
So I could ave a chance to edit
I have chosen to let go and let God
So with my hand in His hands 
I am going to let go of my past
Look my present straight in the eye
And tell my future that it isn’t 
Going to take me unawares
Watch out for my new edition
Cos God is really working on it
You may have doubts that it will come
But I assure you that it will
At the appointed time
While you wait there is
Something you ought not to do
Don't judge me!

BY: BRIDGET E. UKENI

ANALYSIS:
This poem is a work of fiction.
Bible Verse: 
James 2:4(NIV) Have you not discriminated among yourselves and become judges with evil thoughts?

It is true that what we hear about people go a long way in determining the first impression we have of them. Most times we hear only one part of the story (usually the negative part) and we don't even bother to know the reason behind them. Hence, it is not fair that our perspective of someone is defined only by an "incomplete story" and the things of the past.
Let us not be quick to judge and try to give people a second chance at changing the "bad" impression we have of them.

I will post the recording of this poem later on. 
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